I wrote an email today turning down the opportunity to write that journal article I mentioned a few days ago. First and foremost I want to be clear, my intentions were pure, I just have come to grips with the reality that I do not have the ability right now. It has nothing to do with my desire or my competency…..I am just not together enough since my stroke to write on that level.

But interestingly enough, as I gathered this weekend with our staff, two of them shared that they had also received a similar request from the same source. It now appears that the solicitation for articles from this journal, if “solicitation” is the proper description (I am not sure if it is…it’s a stroke thing), went to a “list” rather than just a few people they thought they might want to hear from. And personally, that made the whole thing harder for me, not because I do not have a fine staff, I know I do, I think they are the best and very capable, but because I really struggled with whether or not this was something I was being called to do. There is a big difference in my mind about being selected, perhaps because of your work, and being cast upon by a wide net. The notes were all very personal, and in the midst of my rehab I took them very seriously and struggled with the issue of my current ability. But had I known it was sent to a list (apparently partially a CANA list) I wouldn’t have struggled so much with it. Had I known it was a blanket offer, I would have just taken a quick “pass” and offered to do it later….just like I did today. You see writing an article in my current state would have really been pushing myself, and I did consider it. Amanda and I even had a “disagreement” about it, because I thought it was too much for me to attempt in my current state of rehab, while she thought it would be good for me. All of it now however, just seems to have been an unnecessary struggle. I have passed, and I hope, and believe, I will one day write for a journal somewhere….but all in the Lord’s good time. It is good to take this off my radar screen.

As for me, in truth, sermons and all that I already do is more than enough, and often even all of that is too much for me! But no worries, I will make it through! After all, with God all things are possible! He’s taken me this far, and I know He still has a lot more planned for my life! Writing journal articles may not be in my immediate future (just like movie stardom, professional sports, and modelling) but each new day brings me (and all of us) a little further along this road with Him.

Life is a journey, full of twists and turns, but He walks it with us and makes each day both an adventure and an opportunity.

I could not imagine it, nor would I want it, any other way!

Nite my friends, and God Bless.

Tom+