I’ve seen a lot of amazing things over the course of my lifetime, but never really had anything as weird as some of the things I have seen happen to me, that is until today.  I was up early, about 5am, but not totally by my choice.  I had a cortisone shot in my right shoulder about a week and a half ago, and although it is a bit better, it is still quite sore.  Amanda was sleeping and was apparently having some sort of dream.  She put her arm across my chest, which woke me up, but it was nothing that I could not fall back asleep from.  But then, although I didn’t ask her specifically, she must have been playing Family Feud, and the button that she was quickly and sternly pushing was located, you guessed it, on the sore part of my right shoulder.

Now I should say that I conducted a bit of an experiment from that point on, as once someone pushes on an injury like that the amount of adrenaline coursing through your veins is enough to keep you awake for days.  But my wife gets in dreams and they are kind of interesting to watch.  Sometimes she talks, and will even ask me questions.  Yes they are weird and make no sense, but she is asleep.  It is pretty funny.  Other times she moves around and does things, like today……pushing on a button.  And as I spent the next 15 minutes or so in bed, she probably did it 5 more times.  I just hope she won the final round.

But after I decided I had enough I went down to the kitchen and poured a coffee (it is on a timer) and just like always I spilled a bit over the edge.  But I had to laugh, and it is tonight’s picture…….it looks just like my grandma’s old gray long haired cat Lollipop!

Now anyone in my family with any memory can tell you that the general opinion was that Lollipop did not like me, and it is widely speculated that it had something to do with me covering her with Vicks when I was three.  She always seemed to hiss at me, at least publicly, and I teased her a lot with my Uncle Dave, but in all honesty I loved that cat, and I really think that she loved me.  I looked all over for a picture I have of her somewhere and had hoped to post it with this one as it was her hissing.  But if the truth be known, I think it was just a show, as that cat could have taken me any time she wanted.  I was always there and it would have taken little effort on her part.  The could have just discovered me in the morning dead on the davenport where I used to sleep.  I am sure no one would have suspected a thing.

But she never did, nor was she ever the aggressor with me.  In her final years she would even grace me with permission to pat her, and it quite honestly meant a lot.  You see, the Vicks thing to me was just a story, I have no recollection about it at all.  I just knew a cat that my grandma loved and wondered why I couldn’t get on her good side. (most in my family would say that it was because she didn’t have one, but I know better)

Anyway, my coffee spill reminded me of her instantly, and I immediately just laughed and forgot about my sore old shoulder, and missed my (alleged) adversary.  I normally don’t leave spills on the counter, but I left it there, and even took this picture, and showed the original spill to both Amanda and Ben before I wiped it up. (Ben thought it was America with a tail…..he needs some work)  But I couldn’t recreate that if I tried.  It is not exactly Jesus appearing on a piece of toast, but it is about as zany as I have ever gotten.

And I will take it too, and without judgement.  It wasn’t an accident, as I spill coffee like that every morning, but it was no miracle either.  I am just thankful for the memory of that angry old cat that I loved.  I just wish I had a do-over button to push to do it all again, as I would in a heartbeat, but this time sans the Vicks.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Well I am occasionally going to hop on the “With It” Train and take part in cultural trends.  So today, which I think is quite possibly Thursday, I will take the opportunity to partake in what (again and still) is known as “Throwback Thursday.”  And today I will post this spectacular picture of ME when I was more of a dapper dresser, AND when I had a lot more hair.

Oddly enough, the black and white gives it away as this picture also looks like my dad, my brother, my two sons, and perhaps Brad Pitt at that age.  But on a close scientific comparison, if we Tirmans were ever to spring for such a thing, I would like to think they (scientists) would find me far superior.  But like most things of that nature my wife, who just happens to be a scientist, AND who also just happens to pay our bills each month, would probably just find it a colossal waste of resources.  The truth is, I am the only one of us to “get” (you know….trick, trap, flim-flam, coerce) a scientist into MARRYING ME which I feel should just settle it anyhow.  But we were all handsome devils back in the day (our own days) and that generally suffices for us all.

And I am holding the famous “Goggie,” who I kept and carried all the way until he was just a swath of fabric.  He looks pretty good here though.  I am not sure what Mike had, but Scotty had a Goggie too, and I think it may be in a box somewhere, Steph had a Simba and I KNOW where that is (it is here and not with her), and Ben has a blankie that is a lot like Goggie at the end.  And although we all carried some type of animal or other sleeping utensil, I am pretty certain I was the only one to have such a good looking jacket.  Incidentally, I no longer have that.

But I just thought I would share.  In all honesty, I think it is pretty funny that we all kind of looked the same (not Steph), but I really posted it selfishly.  You see I always enjoyed, even as an adult, hearing my mom or my grandparents talk about me and my Goggie at that age.  It was just a great way to remember some fond memories…..and tonight I needed that.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+ (and Goggie posthumously)

Don’t worry, it’s okay.  Amanda and I classify our home as a “family farm” since her garden is as big as Kansas itself, so our six year old is allowed to serve as our HVAC technician.  Actually, that is not only not quite the truth, it is not true at all, other than the part about the garden and having a six year old.  What is true is that I was changing the furnace filters today and Ben not only wanted to learn about them, but also help.  So we began with the number one basic rule……working with anything mechanical and/or electrical, the first thing to do is to turn it OFF, and we did.

And Ben thought he was “all that” to quote the famous Amanda Bynes, who I really used to love on Nickelodeon, but who clearly like many child actors, succumbed to the pressures of stardom.  I am certain I would have been different given the chance, but alas childhood stardom and Hollywood was not in the cards for me, nor is it as an adult (if I ever get there).  But my shattered dreams have very little to do with HVAC, or with Ben’s ever expanding trade skills.  I can already tell that one day I will be working for him.

The bottom line however is that the filters have been replaced and we are good to go for quite some time.  I will say that we have two furnaces and therefore two filters.  One I had forgotten to change as I had the wrong size a year ago and even though it still looked good we changed it.  But the other was really due to be replaced in May and was filthy.  And as I thought about it, the clean filter that lasted so long was for the side of the house with our bedroom and my office.  The dirty filter which still had three months was from the side with……..wait for it……all the kids’ bedrooms!  So despite my lack of stardom in films, if there was an Academy Award for hygiene I would be a lock.

But our time together changing filters was a time to teach as well.  Ben now understands the difference between return air ducts and heating ducts, he also understand air flow.  Stuff like that may seem ridiculous to some to teach a kid, but the more you learn the more you same later.  I can fix most things in my house for the cost of parts.  My kids will be able to too.  After all, who wants to pay someone $50 to put in a $20 air filter.  Labor is expensive, but not in our family.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Well yet another stint for me as chauffeur (for my wife) and tutor (for the boy) tonight, and at my age and with my current aging brain and vision, I am clearly on borrowed time.  Ben is already explaining things to me I do not know, and he is in first grade and the older kids and Amanda are already touring nursing facilitates and imagining ways to take away my driver’s license.  My friend Randy and I used to joke about acting all senile and such when we got to this age as a prank, but dag nabbit (authentic old person lingo, or dag wabbit to use a Fuddism) it is far too risky to do as they are already planning our committals.  Why give them the ammo??

But tonight as Ben and I sat in the Panera doing his homework, I was amazed at how I was watching my wife shine through him.  He is looking up here, which was not the norm tonight as he had his nose in the book and was eating his soup, breaking concentration on the text only a couple of times. He was really laser focused, which is the mark of my wife.  He literally was impressive. It was a very proud experience for me, as focus upon the tasks at hand often evade me.  At 6 I wanted to goof off and at 52 I still do.  Heck, I didn’t even read a book for leisure until I was 26.  He is his mom’s son in this, and although he still manages to goof off (a lot) he also manages to evade trouble, showing clearly that the Mongold genes have what it takes to correct the defect in the Tirman ones, you know the ones that make us like to know principals.

But my hope and prayer for him is that he will get to the discipline himself of getting these things, like homework and the expansion of his mind, into his routine by habit and desire rather than by coercion. Right now I am not using coercion as much as I am using good old fashioned American bribery, but you get the point.  He needs to get this because he wants to, otherwise he really will be living with me forever.

Off to pick up Miss Daisy.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!


Tommy+

Of course “back in the day,” meaning when I was young, not too many of us wore “eye black.”  No one had packaged it yet, or put some sort of logo on it while making it reusable.  It’s not that we were not good athletes back then, but it just wasn’t something we needed to make ourselves look tough enough, whereas athletes today have all sorts of things, such as eye black, at their disposal.

Today’s athletes however use it for much more than its intended use.  They use it more like Indian war paint.  For them, it is meant to intimidate and create fear, and is really part of gaining that mental advantage over one’s opponents.  In truth, we never thought of such things.  Our jerseys and basic equipment was enough.  We were not the benefactors of modern convenience, and as we understood it everything on the field (or ice as I knew it) could be taken care of by hard work and effort, and everything else could be fixed with athletic tape.  But sports were evolving, even then.  Face guards in hockey for instance came out and became a requirement when I was playing.  Of course we complained about them and did our best to modify them to please ourselves, but safety was changing the game.

All of this is one of the reasons that was a taskmaster about safety and safety gear as a coach, since I wasn’t concerned as a player as I was invincible.  I sport some pretty impressive porcelain teeth that were posted into my jawbone as a young man as I thought mouth guards were useless.  I have since come to understand that I was right, except now I would add “if you do not wear them.”  Eye black, which became popular back then too was to help you see better by stopping the reflection of light from the sun, yet the sun didn’t seem like too much an issue inside ice arenas. But guys in the outdoor sports did begin wearing it, regardless of whether they were playing or riding the bench waiting for their time (in the sun here is implied).  

The bottom line was that it DID make them look a lot cooler and intimidating than they were without it, and it seems to have been part of teams I have been a part of ever since.  I will say that I do not recall it at all when I was under 10 because if it were what it is today at all we all would have had it in Little League where we were barely strong enough to lift our bats.  But it did come, and it is prevalent in sports today.  And regardless of who wears it, it does up the intimidation factor quite a bit.

And you will notice that I did not say 100%, and that is because Ben got some put on this past Saturday at Steph’s game.  And as a old guy I still know that regardless of who you are, or how good or bad you are at a sport, the very last thing you want to do is to put on eye black and hear the words “cute” or “adorable.”  Yet as you can see from the picture, this Tirman has a long way to go.

Of course, at Ben’s age Steph was a math nerd (okay, she kind of still is) and Scotty was, well just Scotty.  Neither showed any indication of what they would become, and for that I know not to rush to judgement with Ben.  Steph tried to pastorally address this with me over the weekend by mentioning a few sports (okay not really sports to ME, but I will refrain from mentioning them as to not offend anyone) that Ben might try.  It was her way of presenting a course of action for the seemingly black sheep of an athletic family, after all it is hard to envision Ben being an MVP in any sport, as she and Scotty both were in multiple years, when he acts like Spongebob (not Scotty, Ben).

But I gave up having my kids live into my expectations about sports long ago, not for them, but for me.  It was then that I could enjoy it, and even had they not done so well I would still have.  Steph still plays, and is a senior on the number 14th ranked D2 team in the country.  Scotty could have played, but went into the Marines instead.  He is now, on his off time, the head coach of a men’s high school team just off base and had his first games this weekend.

And Ben will continue to wear eye black (poorly) and run like a dork, and be cute, as well as adorable. I am proud of him just as much.  I know to not work to control it, but to let it happen. (Ask Scotty how well it worked when he tried to play ice hockey)  Ben however, will be fine.  And whatever sport he plays (right now he is in Taekwondo) he will be what he is supposed to be.  I just don’t want him to feel the pressure.

After all he has big shoes to fill.  Steph may be a top tier lacrosse player and Scotty a Marine, and both may be hot shot high school MVPs, but I have porcelain teeth bolted into my jaw, and what could ever be cooler than that?

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Well I am happy to post tonight, but saddened that our quick trip has ended.  At the last minute, we decided to make a run to Missouri to see Steph and the #11 ranked (USA NCAA Division 2) Lindenwood Lions Women’s Lacrosse team beat Shorter University (from Georgia) 20 to 0.  It was an exciting game, PLUS a lot warmer than last week’s game.  And although I got some great videos from the game, they do not post well on here from my iPhone.  So I had to take pictures later from our after game get together.

But clearly videos are much clearer as six year olds, just like sharks, never stop moving, so still are always blurred.  The first picture is clear of Steph and blurry of Ben, as Steph is the one who is 22.  The second picture I am certain would show Steph clearly too had not her brother, who is also a ham, photo bombed her shot, and perfectly at that.  He thinks he is hilarious, and I suppose I will admit he is, but I want to classify my photos by who I can see rather than who he is obstructing.  And in “speaking” with him, he swears he understands, however the evidence shows it to be nothing more than lip service.  I even stop him and ask him if he can see me right in front of him after my warnings, which he always answers in the affirmative, yet the lack of changing will lead him down a dark path in time.  Scotty got it straight in the Marines.  Ben, if he heads there may cause the retirement or breakdown of the best of the best Drill Instructors at boot camp.

But Steph certainly enjoys it, and that brings me great joy.  They hang together, read books and see movies together, and talk more to each other than to Amanda and me.  It is a blessing, and one that they both will treasure forever.  And we are more than happy to provide them both with the opportunity!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Yes, this is a picture of actual schoolwork from our son Ben.  It is also clearly an assignment, as I really do not believe he would have any such aspirations, although after reading this many people, including myself if I were young, would vote for him.  And it shall serve as “evidence enough” that the activation of our voting rights AFTER the required schooling we as Americans complete is good policy.  After all, he is clearly a schmoozer.

Of course I am very drawn to using these promises as the content of my post tonight, but retelling it really ruins your ability to experience and enjoy it in its original.  All I suppose I can add to it is that it is clearly something that keeps the school counselors employed….yep job security.   It is the Tirman contribution to society, keeping the counselors employed and the principals and deans busy.  And before you think the counselors’ security is tied into talking to Ben, please note that I really meant talking to the staff that has to deal with him.  As most Tirmans would tell you, throughout history we are often known to the Administrations of the schools we attend, but rarely for the noble reasons.  And as most Tirmans who have met Ben would tell you, he is a bit further “along” than most of us.   And where Scotty was me on caffeine, Ben is Scotty on steroids.

But for tonight we just can all be thankful he will not want to be president.  And we are quite thankful that he provides us with a lot of joy and laughter.  In fact, his teachers and school staff would tell you the same.  We just have the privilege of living with him 24/7.

We just ask that you keep the poor girl who one day will marry him in your prayers.  She has no idea what she is heading into…..after all, no girl grows up aspiring just to be the First Lady.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

I would really like to say I was able to post this last night, February 21st, but I have had a headache these past few days that has gotten progressively worse, and last light I was in bed early.  My wife gets migraines, and I do NOT want to compare my headache with those.  Anyone who has been around people who get migraines know that there is a massive difference between the two.  But that does not make my headache insignificant, as it is to me.  And having it from Wednesday, and still till now, wears you down.

So I will post two today, this one for yesterday, and another later (hopefully not tomorrow) for today. And today I have decided to post a picture of a person Ben thinks is himself, but is actually Scotty around the same age or a little older.  Ben insists that it is him, but Ben has not played a day of baseball in his life.  Scotty however was a very good baseball player, and primarily a catcher.  And yes, for those of you who know anything about baseball catchers, this picture had to be taken PRE-game as catchers are always filthy.

This picture however is not quite enough retribution for their sister, who’s picture of her and her telescope has resulted in endless ribbing and the use of it as a background picture for the phones of some of the younger teammates on her college lacrosse team.  Oh don’t worry Steph, we will get there, but Amanda and I decided to not post any of the Scotty “fro” pictures until after the wedding and we have Kenzie as a daughter-in-law.  Up to then it just risks too much.

But this will do for now, both in terms of a picture and a post.  Ben still thinks it’s him, Steph will still think it is not enough, Scott still will be thankful, and I still have a headache.

See you all tonight!

Tommy+

Yes, let me begin with a sincere apology to our local “Greek’s Pizzaria” who in no way is connected with this post, nor should it be implied that it is.  In fact, I know the owner of it and he is quite a delightful guy, although we have not ever eaten there.  Tonight’s title is only to indicate DNA, and when I say “DNA,” I mean the geeky, nerdy, DNA that Ben has inherited from his mom.  The kid is meticulous.

But earlier in the week he decided he wanted to make pizza.  Last time we ventured into this world he made a calzone, and he used crescent rolls for the crust.  This time however he made his own dough, as he wanted to be authentic, as well as the fact that he always takes all of mine.  So yes, all this is to say that Ben Tirman made pizza from scratch.

Since however I was his tutor, mentor, or slave (depending upon your perspective) I made sure that the “measuring” was more to my suiting than scientific.  He was like a little mad scientist pouring things in and mixing them up (with the big Kitchen Aid blender too), and he even waited patiently as I not only explained yeast, but as he waited for his dough to rise a bit.  He even made his own sauce.  Granted I opened the can of tomato sauce for him, but he chose the spices and amounts himself (I had set out common pizza spices) and there was NO sugar.

Of course much of the kneading included the words “Hi Yah,” if those really are words, and karate chopping seems to be his technique of choice.  I will say that it was actually very good, and far better with the crust he made than the pre-made one.   He did a great job and was very proud, as he should be. Both his brother and sister learned to cook in the same way, but Steph and Scott are gravitating more towards the “Amanda Timan Exact-a-mundo”style, so Ben is my last chance.  Otherwise my style will just pass on when I do.

But the end result was awesome pizza and proud parents.  He’s smart and he can cook, so if he just didn’t need to have someone to tell about Minecraft he could probably avoid getting married someday. But for now we will not jump the gun.  As most of us know, cooking skills can go south in a moments notice (my apologies to the Confederacy, as this is clearly a negative northern expression), so we just have to wait.

But waiting with foods like pizza is a pretty sweet deal.  If only he would take the same kind of interest into something just as useful, such as cleaning his room.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Today has been quite the adventure!  I have been to Indianapolis and back, I have purchased out tax program, I have dropped off and picked Ben up from school, I was able to FINALLY find a pair of tennis shoes (though I do not play tennis) and I ended the day with Ben at Panera in Noblesville as we waited for Amanda to get done with her haircut.

Such adventures always provide quite a bit of “thought” material, and most of mine tonight has been thinking about what I was thinking when I became a parent.  I was trailed by Ben all through the Kohl’s and the Walmart for about an hour and constantly apologizing to his incessant talk about Minecraft. Yes, just ask him if you dare.  I do not remember him heading to any special school for this, but he obviously has a PhD.  And, his talk is one constant lecture that he is giving.  Tonight, much to the horror of those Minecraft neophytes around us, he spoke of spawning animals and their eventual arrival at some sort of Minecraft pig/cow heaven where they even have wings.

Of course on countless points I could have corrected his theology, but I was so enjoying people’s reactions that I just let it ride.  After all I thought, Steph and Scott turned out okay, and it was pretty entertaining then too.  What surprises me is just how different each of them is!  And I just hope someday they all come to realization that endured them all.  Maybe, just maybe, it will keep me out of the nursing home.

But for now I will just enjoy the time I have.  I am living the dream, no, certainly not like he is, but then again that would be a clear sign I am well off the cliff.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+