First of all, let me say that this is does not taste one thing like avocados, but compared to many of the other bars I eat, such as the ones from Atkins or Special K, this one probably has the best effectiveness for me in terms of calorie intake.  It just doesn’t have good flavor, nor can you taste the supposed basil and olives.  But the hotel sets them out like they are desirable, and since I am not a big fan of mints I thought I would give it a try……1 star out of 5 for sure.

But despite the hotel, we headed to Pennsylvania to see the second of Steph’s two games out there this weekend.  The first was on Friday, and Ben had school so we stayed in town.  But the second was today against #15 Indiana University of Pennsylvania.  Lindenwood is #13, but even if they weren’t, speaking entirely for every person from my home state (it’s Indiana if you haven’t guessed) I think they should have beaten them badly just for trying to steal our state name.  PLUS, if you go to or went to Indiana University HERE (in Indiana) you might feel cheated, as these students who stole your/our name have snow apparently 360 days a year and actually attend class.  What kind of program do they run there anyway?

But the identity theft and confusion did not stop the Lions from winning 19-11, which I personally declared as a vindication for all people from Indiana.  I would say for all “Hoosiers,” but many of us who are products of the state feel that name really means someone who went to IU.  It is not nearly as big an issue for me, as I went to Butler, but I wouldn’t want to call those two Purdue girls I posted about yesterday Hoosiers.  That could lead to “justifiable homicide.”  The theme of this paragraph therefore is a win for the Lindenwood Lions.

But we are not home and pretty dang tired.  It was great to see the game though and especially Steph. They head to I think Georgia, Florida, or the Carolinas next, meaning WARM games that I probably will not make it to as Ben still has school and I cannot drive that far without having to stay in a hotel.

And I am still reeling from the bar I ate at the last one.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Well since we couldn’t make it to Steph’s game in Slippery Rock, Pennsylvania yesterday (apparently there is some sort of law that states that Ben has to attend “school”) I still was able to get a lacrosse fix by attending some college games in Indianapolis that featured a few former players of mine.  And it gave me the idea that I could connect with all of them again, even if it was not lacrosse and get some pictures to post.  Today however, all these girls continue to play the game.

The first is Alyssa Jarvis, who plays for Indiana University.  She is one of my daughter’s closest friends and they still hang out often when Steph is at home.  She, like Steph, is a senior and will have to be entering life pretty soon.  Sadly, I could not stay for any of her games, but did see her for this picture!!

The second is Nikki Tombers who is at Purdue.  Nikki was the one who let me know about the games, and it was fun to see her play offense for the first time ever this morning.  She was a defender in high
school and through her entire college playing career.  She did pretty good too!!  I didn’t hear one “I’ve got ball,” from her though as it is more of a defender thing.

The third is Claire Hoover, who took up lacrosse in high school and who played a lot of defense (for me) but always made it clear she wanted to be up closer to the goal.  She also plays for Purdue and is up where she wanted!!  I
retired from coaching just after her first year, but I knew she would always do well.  When you want to mix it up it is a coach’s dream!!

And the last is Morgan Williams, who plays for Taylor University and was a mainstay for me at defense all the time she played for me. I used to encourage her to carry the ball and move up, but she liked to defend and pass off more than any player at that position I ever had…..she was good at it too.  Oddly enough, she plays midfield now and I watched with dismay her carry the ball up the field through a lot of traffic.

The Lindenwood Lions won again last night, and although I could not be there, this was a pretty awesome morning!  I had and have a great deal of admiration for every one of the girls I have coached and I sure do miss them.  Each one has left me personally better than I was before.  Today, I got to see four really great ones too.

And yes, of course they are young women, and will soon all be making their marks on the world.  But today I am thankful for the mark they have made upon me and how today, in particular, they were able to do it again!  It has been a great day!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Tonight was a great, but also a hard night.  Tonight I was able to get together and see my niece Amelia (my sister Stephanie’s daughter), and her boyfriend Ryan (whom I had never met!) as they were in Indianapolis.  We were able to meet them for dinner when they were with my dad (and Debby and Anna), so we had a great time!  I had not seen her since my mom’s funeral, which has been quite some time.  It really warmed my heart to see her.  She is a fine young woman and Ryan seemed to be a pretty great guy!  I knew he existed, but there is a big difference between theory and reality!!  It was a fun night.

But where it was hard was not being with Steph (my daughter) who was playing in Pennsylvania tonight.  They won, but the lack of being able to watch her play was pretty hard on me.  I missed it. We did listen to the majority of it on the radio, as it was not available on video, but it was really impossible to figure out what I normally could see.  Sure I was happy with the victory, but parents focus on their kids and you just cant do that on radio, especially a broadcast from a student run station.

And my dad fell yesterday and jacked up his shoulder, so although you cannot tell from the picture, his arm is in a sling.  He was “not happy” about that, and I didn’t think he should be.  But he was a good sport about it and we were all able to be there together.

Anyway, I was VERY glad we went.  I miss Amelia, and I was very thankful for the opportunity.  Her mom and I were typical siblings (I was always right and she was always wrong) but it made me wish she could have been there.

Life changes, people grow up, they may move, and we all get older.  We can long for the old days, or we can remember them fondly, as they do not stay closer the more we long.  We just need to enjoy what we have and give thanks for what we are given.   And I did, and I am….

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Life is sure filled with its ups and downs, yet I don’t find it nearly as difficult as some people make it to be.  I suppose as the world sees more and more gray, I still just see a lot of black and white.  I am reminded of the one of the great misquotes of all time, first (mis)taken from Commodore Perry concerning the Battle of 1812, “We have seen the enemy and the enemy is us.”  Perry used “ours.”

But as I look around life, I am befuddled to see how it is often mired in dysfunction.  Despite being technologically advanced, we have become imprisoned to our constant contact to each other.  Unless you live in a very isolated place, you cannot drive a mile without seeing someone talking while driving on their phone, and if you drive but another mile you will find another texting.  Of course you may say, “Tom, isn’t this far better than a newspaper and dog on a lap in t
he car?”  To which I answer, “You are just not getting this, are you?”  Then again, the irony of this all is I a posting this on an electronic blog which you may be reading while you drive anyway.

But in truth, we have become “too big for our britches,” as my grandma used to say.  We are too well connected, yet not connected at all, listening to each other, yet not there for each other.  Even in the Church, we are eager to issue communiques and important points of theology and development, but aren’t willing to walk with each other.  It is a disappointment and a road a further mess, and I cannot believe that it is pleasing to God, but many of us may disagree since they probably know him well as they follow Him on Twitter.

But although I am offering no solution, I will say the first step is identifying the problem, and to me it is clear.  How to deal with it, I do not know.  I like being connected, I really do, but in truth it is really superficial in many ways.  It is better than nothing, but as for me, I want to do better.  And this is my first step of fighting it in my own life…..thanks for being a part, now watch those pedestrians!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

In my blog for Shrove Tuesday, I failed to exhibit the sign that Ben went upstairs and made for the dog as it was a chocolate cake.  Viper had been known to eat a chocolate chip cooke every now and again, but even though chocolate is toxic to canines, it takes far more of it to poison a full grown male Golden Retriever than it does, lets say a Pomeranian.  So this is to say, Ben made a sign that was prominently displayed on the side of the island upon which the cake was set.

Tonight’s picture is from this morning, and Ben was fascinated to find it.  It seemed intriguing to me that he was less concerned that Viper ate chocolate or w
orse yet broke his Ash Wednesday fast, as he was that he altered his sign by crossing out the word “not.”  I personally was amused that he swelled allowed “alloud,” as he is the family genius on spelling.  But in time he seemed to take it all in stride. His cake was actually safe and had been moved to “a non-disclosed location.”

So that is really it for this evening, and I won’t write any more.  It is not that I am not alloud, but it has more to do with my need for sleep.  Today has been a long and busy day, and my bed just seems to be calling my name!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Well tonight for Shrove Tuesday, Ben’s Pizza Kitchen was open yet again, and he worked hard to make his mom a couple (as he only eats one kind) of pizzas and some calzones.  I just handle the hot stuff and he does the rest, including how much of what to put in.  It was spectacular!

He however, wanted to make his mom dessert tonight so we decided to bake a cake.  To my knowledge he had not ever done that before, at least alone, so I measured out all the stuff, he mixed it together, and wala…..Shrove Tuesday Chocolate on Chocolate Cake.  And, as you can see from the picture next to this, he “marked it with a B,” and he put it in the oven for mommy and BEN, as I am not the object of his affections for such things.  He frosted and then frosted the big B as well.  It looked pretty spectacular.

Of course six year olds have their limitations, which usually mean that their parents set some sort of boundaries.  No normal six year old would do so for his or herself.  So we all ate pizza and it was good, and we all also enjoyed a piece of his delicious chocolate cake.  He liked baking it, and he liked decorating it, but he didn’t want to eat the B, nor did he seem dissatisfied about being limited to one piece.

But I had to run to the pharmacy to pick up a prescription and when I left the cake was out on the counter, and, it was perfectly in tact.  At 10 years old our dog Viper tends to not swipe stuff anymore, especially when someone is home, so I didn’t worry about him.  And our cat is not even interested in tuna or catnip let alone cake.  This all reinforced my belief that the cake would be safe for the 30 minutes or so I would be gone.  But on my arrival back home, the second picture is what I discovered. And it has the definite MO of someone who is six.

Certainly it could have been his mom who was just trying to frame him, but she is too OCD to eat all that frosting without some sort of discernible pattern.  The dog and cat are also not suspects as there would have been nose prints or paw prints as well as a tumbled pan if they were.  This all clearly indicates that the chef was downstairs without supervision, quite possibly with a professional frosting gauge, as you can see from the picture this cake has been mined.

But I am giving him a pass as it is Shrove Tuesday.  He normally eats a ton of pancakes, so a little frosting addiction seems quite innocuous.  After all, we also call it Fat Tuesday, and he did make us dinner to boot.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

As a guy, I have never been too fond of Matthew McConaughey.  As most of us guys know, women seem to just fawn over him all the time, and who wants to go out to the movies and PAY to have your wife or girlfriend (if you are not married of course) be all transfixed upon him rather than you……after all guys, it’s all about us, right?  But in all truth, in all the time I have been alive ANY conversation I have heard about him when there has been a woman involved has ALWAYS included some sort of reference to how “dreamy” he is (to use a reference from my grandma’s time rather than a modern one, as we guys really tire of that sort of thing).

So since I have not ever had to, I have not watched anything with him in it.  It has not been a very intentional protest like my insistence to not watch anything with Kathy Griffin or a few others, but I just have not made the time for it.  After all, I graduated from high school in 1979, so paying to relive a life I have already lived by watching “Dazed and Confused” just seemed redundant and a waste of cash, but as I said, I was not really committed to the avoidance cause.  I really do not watch much at all anyway.

But I do read a lot online, and I of course post this blog.  Every morning I log on and wish people a happy birthday (if it is their birthday) and every night I write and post.  And today, after logging on to do the birthday thing this morning, I read a few things and one was about Matthew McConaughey and his acceptance speech.

Yes, before I clicked on the link to the video I did look around to make sure that there were no other husbands or men around as I didn’t really want to turn in my man card or have some group of women suddenly show up in my office, while I incidentally was in my really great looking Chicago Cubs pajamas, and be all drooly over him. But seeing none, I opened the link, and what I witnessed amazed me.

You see, one of the reasons that men aren’t fond of Matthew McConaughey is that he makes us feel a bit insecure.  You see the very sight of him raises women’s blood pressure and captures their attention like we used to do, and still think we do, but only in our minds.  But here was a man who I judged wrongly, very wrongly in fact, and I am here willing to admit that proudly.  Sure, he is good looking, and sure he is a successful movie star and all, but where I was wrong was to see him as that and only that, through the eyes of a man, which color that with a slight tinge of disdain. But as I said, I was wrong, very wrong in fact about him, and I am glad to admit that too.

Oddly enough, stereotypes really bother me and to find myself
mired on the wrong side of one is only troublesome to me if I don’t correct it.  So let me say I watched the clip of his acceptance speech, not once, but many times. He was honest, faithful, charming, and unapologetic for being who he was.  And that meant a lot to me as it truly convicted me about him, and how my beliefs about him were wrong.

Matthew McConaughey thanked God in his speech and people hardly clapped, I noticed that right away, but what I noticed more was him…..it didn’t bother him at all.  It wasn’t about what they believed or thought, it was about what he did.  And I gained not just a lot of respect for the man at that point, but a lot of admiration too.

It is not about doing battle, it is about heart and about what you believe.  It always has been and it always will be.  And in the end, it is who you are that matters not who you hang with or what you have achieved.  He won an Academy Award for best actor, yet despite that achievement, the highest in his field, it was clear that he knew he would not be taken it with him when he leaves this earth.  He put, and puts, first things first.

All this is to say, I think I am going to endure a few movie nights with my wife.  He, in one small glimpse of not a character, but him as a man, has inspired me to be a better one myself.  Thanks Matthew!

Goodnight and God Bless!

Tommy+

Yes, this is a picture of Ben and his sister Steph, and three of his additional girlfriends attending “happy hour” last night at our hotel in Missouri. Yes, we went to another game, as this one was against the #1 team in the country, but unlike many morons, we do not post when and where we travel, even when we have people at our house in our absence, which we really always do.  (And an additional yes for burglars, sometimes these people who stay are MARINES…..so go ahead if you really want to be humiliated in the news by that sort of thing.)

But anyway, all our kids are close, and Ben and Steph in particular enjoy these visits with her team. The girls all treat him like a king, and even the head coach gave him some cigars yesterday, but appropriately bubble gum ones.  And like last year, he attended the autograph session after the game where all the players signed this year’s poster over their pictures.  Steph is finally a senior and the seniors are featured every year on it too.  But Ben ALSO has them sign his arms.  So yes, (to use another one) Ben will attend Lapel Elementary tomorrow all tatted up as this is done with indelible marker.  But they love him and he loves them as well.  They are all very top notch athletes with even bigger hearts.  And I will miss them when this experience is over, but probably not as much as Ben. He was a just a little goober when Steph started college, but now these are very real relationships to him.  I am just hoping that like the girls Steph grew up with, they keep connected and come to see us.  A lot of them are like family to us all.

But we are home and left and drove straight through a lot of treacherous weather.  Yes, there were vehicles off the roads everywhere, but the roads were really typical of what I grew up in in winter, and the display of abandoned accidents and slide offs, indicated the lack of understanding of driving on ice, and snow complicated by speed and wind.  I really don’t care if you have a heavy vehicle and 4 wheel drive, even a Zamboni would loose control at those speed.  And time is also unimportant here and showing up to wherever you are going is far more difficult if you are seriously injured or die.  Plenty of people were risking both.

I however and exhausted yet it was a great trip.  Being there to get to watch her play college is why I “retired” (temporarily) from coaching women’s lacrosse.  He time as a player is coming to an end, as is my hiatus from head coaching.  I am not looking forword to the first, but I am the latter.  I just want to see Lindenwood make a run at the National title, and in all honesty, they are still in the hunt.

You see, happy hour, is all about perspective.  And I was certainly happy about the entire day.  I am on a break from coaching and a long period since being a player (although ice hockey) BUT there is a hell of a big difference between skill and heart.  And heart is what I witnessed yesterday, and it almost defeated the #1 team in the country.

It’s still there, and I hope they can see and feel it.  Skill issues are always correctable on the surface with coaching, while heart, with motivation, comes from deep within each individual.  It transforms players into what they never imagined they could be.  And as a player and a coach, it is the Holy Grail of what happens when a team gets it.  I saw it coming and I see it in many of them, the challenge will be those who focus on a 2 point loss, one of an open goal shot (no goalie in the next) and the other by a pretty poorly called yellow card in a crucial and tight game.

I told Steph today however before we left that it was a blessing they got beat.  Being #1 early can lead to cockiness, and cockiness can lead to carelessness.  Good coaches, and I am one, will tell you EVERY game is important, and in every game you play it like it is the MOST important one.  They all start 0-0 and the team and attitude you bring to each game needs to be the one you want to take all the way.  Nothing is insignificant.

I played (ice hockey) and I have coached for close to 25-30 years.  I have never had any team go undefeated.  But I have been a part of ruining that experience, and sometimes quite handily, of undefeated teams.  Heart is the most important.  It trumps skill as it always reflects drive and character.

I am excited to see where this all leads.  But it blessed me very much, as I am there for both my daughter and her team…..but just likes the girls, but that too is heart and skill.

And hopefully by the end of May we will all be happier than we all have ever been before.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

As most of you know, particularly regular readers, my daughter Stephanie is a lacrosse player and play for the the 15th ranked (NCAA Division II) Lindenwood Lions, and today they played the 1st ranked Adelphi Panthers in St. Charles, Missouri.

In the lacrosse college lacrosse community, I believe many people were expecting a blowout. Lindenwood is only in its third year of NCAA II lacrosse, but had been for years prior dominant in the ranks below. Adelphi on the other hand is a seasoned program that is primarily an east coast recruiter and a dominant force in D2 lacrosse.

But the game was very competitive and very close, 13 to 11 in fact.  And although Adelphi may retain their ranking, as a former coach (for just the time being) I believe the game hurt them more than the Lions.  I wouldn’t be surprised to find the Lions move up in rank from the game too.  The scales only tipped away in the final few minutes when a referee made a call resulting in a “yellow card” for a Lindenwood player.  It was a VERY questionable call as the game was important and close.  It was indeed a foul, but it was not severe enough to warrant a card and take the Lions down a player.  A ref really decided a game of that importance with a questionable call.  And it is something that drives you wild as a coach whether you are on the sidelines or not.  It was irresponsible and unfortunate.  Yet, as a former athlete and coach, it is ALWAYS a part of the game.  And you have to play around it sometimes to win.

But the loss for the girls was hard on them, and now the challenge really begins.  They are 2-1 in a long and IMPORTANT season with a lot to go.  Now the challenge is to keep their heads in the game, as they will need it.  They have 2 other top 15 teams to face yet, and most others are no slackers either.

But there is nothing to ever be ashamed of.  The Lions almost took out the top team in the country!  I am excited for them, as everyone else will have heard of this game and will now fear who they are!  Way to go Lions!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!


Tommy+