No, this picture is NOT related to my post but it is of Ben’s cast as he broke his are and wrist as his strength “just gave out” on the monkey bars at school.  Surgery and 2 pins will have him back to as normal as he ever is by mid-October.

But in case you have been paying attention, yes, after close to 1700 CONSECUTIVE POSTS since my stroke, I dropped off the face of the earth, at least in terms of this blog.  And yes, there was good reason to do so, as parts of my life had gotten a bit too tumultuous and seemed to demand my attention.  It has been a hard year for me, parts of it devastating, yet despite all that it has been, I know there are much better days to come.

They (and when I say “they” I have no idea what I mean) say you cannot keep a good man down, but I really do not consider myself all that good, and I think “they” also fail to take into account Bobby Darin’s observations about Louie Miller (ask someone over 60).  But nonetheless, the reports of my demise have been severely exaggerated, and I have ever intention to continue on.  I DO INTEND to blog for a few more days and then take about a month off to re-center myself, before striking back out (please note the work BACK is in there) at life and my blog.

Part of what I want you to understand is that NO, I have not had some sort of breakdown or midlife crisis (especially not the later as I am just 52 and intend to live to at least 150 to be a burden on my children), but my faith and mind have led me to consider just how it is I am called to finish the race. (ask someone who reads St. Paul)

When we formed into an Order a few years back and I was elected Superior, my life and ministry had already changed quite dramatically.  At the start of planting churches after retiring from ministry in the Episcopal Church, I would preach and celebrate everywhere and every weekend, traveling an amazing amount of miles each week.  Now some 7 years and many churches later, I still travel, but generally to one per week.  There are Vicars (priests in charge) in all of the churches, and I am less integral to the congregations and more integral to the clergy and the members of the Order.  I still am in charge of the congregations we keep under the Order, but am seen more as a visitor than the pastor.  (like when your grandparents would come and visit….still family, but different).  It makes me often feel as if I don’t have a real home, yet I am always reminded of the words of our Lord who said “What should I do with Tom Tirman.”

In truth, I see all this as part of God’s plan for me.  I was born into the Episcopal Church and ordained in it over 25 years ago, but I never thought I would leave it.  And I didn’t, what I discovered  however was that it left me and the faith delivered to the Saints.  I was still called and followed.  God has blessed this and brought me and many people to this new place, but I can see His Hand moving and changing it still, particularly in me.

And sometimes the most important changes are the scariest.  They certainly cause the most tension and anxiety, and that has been evident in me.  I of course could say “Lord, I am not going to Nineveh,” and perhaps He would provide me a shady plant for a season to rest.  (see Jonah 4) But in all reality I am convinced that He is calling me to where he wants me…..into something deeper.

No, I am not retiring, and no I am not walking away from the Order, my position, or my parishes……but what I am doing is taking some time to be open to let the answers come to me rather than trying to control it all myself.  It’s hard to do for me, but I think God is sending something to take down my shady plant.

So I will be posting today through Tuesday and then taking a sabbatical.  Blogging was never about a record or consecutive posts, but about me and my own prescribed post-stroke therapy.  It has been helpful and has worked, but the intention was never to build it into an empire.  I have had A LOT of followers, and very dedicated ones at that….thank you, but as a “former” athlete and long time coach, I need to remain “coachable,” and I believe that this is part of that process.

So I would ask that you would pray for me as I move ahead as I pray for all who read this.  Good fruit doesn’t always show immediately, and my hope and prayer is that with a bit of pruning and a faithful walk, the best fruits of my life and ministry are yet to come!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+