I really cannot see any way this is my fault. Sure, I understand the Spiderman underwear (I wear them all the time) and I understand the Spiderman boots, I just do not understand them in the middle of summer…..particularly together. This incredible fashion violation, combined with the desire to watch “Thomas the Train,” really indicate that my DNA has taken the backseat to hers. Not that she is a big fan of Thomas or bad fashion, but clearly it is just so very twisted that it could not be from me.
But in truth, I have always been suspicious of my wife…..after all, what kind of woman would really marry me? But she has always been suspect. She just has never made much sense to me. For instance, our bed has the usual four regular pillows, two for sleeping and two for apparent show (in case someone from Ladies Home Journal comes in to snap a picture of our room) and then 245 additional pillows, none of which match, that I never quite place right, but that all apparently belong on our bed. When I go to bed I stack them along one wall. They remind me of those rooms that all the families in my neighborhood had that were pristine and covered in plastic that no one EVER sat in. Let’s face it, fashion and fashion pillows in particular, are not my thing!
But tonight the pillows are on the wall, the boots are off they boy, and he and his Spiderman underpants are trying to talk to me about bats. Why I do not know. But tonight I am just thankful it is not about pillows or fabrics!
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+