Monthly Archives: September 2010

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Hanging with the boys……

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Although Stephanie and Amanda are fun in their own ways, hanging with Ben and Scott is always a treat because unlike the girls, they are rarely serious. They crack people up wherever we go, and I can’t I confess they are mine in those times so readily. Usually I just say, “I’m sorry, they are twin brothers born just 14 years apart.” People either laugh or take a few steps back before running. The boys can’t though……genetics is something one cannot run from. I suppose that’s why when we are ALL together we aren’t…..Stephanie and Amanda usually shop apart from us.

So tonight we went to eat, we went to the store (where I shopped and they ran around through the rows laughing and screaming), we went to a park, and then to two more stores looking for a model they could put together tomorrow. They found one quickly and then laughed with each other at all the gross toys in novelty display at the Michael’s. (Hobby Lobby was closed). We then came home where they flew a balsa wood plane a few times until it broke and then headed to the basement together, asking me to make the brownies before they disappeared.
And now the brownies are all done, Ben is now “Batman,” and is eating as many as he can before his brother gets out of the shower. (He has made quite a dent in the pan.) Indoor lacrosse starts tomorrow night for Scott and for me on Friday……it will be pretty constant until June. But it is the life we live and a great one. And our all boy adventure tonight was just the thing to preface the next few months. I am blessed to have such great kids.
Goodnight my friends and God Bless.
Tommy+
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Numero 800…..

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Yep, my 800th post, and most of them consecutive too. (if you count, I’bet that there are 800 flowers in the picture too) I first would like to thank the Academy….no no no. I really should thank that clot that went to my brain in 2008. After all, I use this blog for my ongoing therapy and it is a good discipline for me.

As the story goes (the abbreviated version) I had a stroke in April of 2008. This blog at the time existed, although its purpose at the time was to be one of those cutting edge blogs of a priest on the front lines of the battle. My stroke of course changed everything.
First of all we noticed that although I could still think and write, my perception of what I was writing was way better than what it actually was (sort of like now, but then the excuse was better). Although what I would write made sense to me, words were often inappropriate (meaning they were the wrong words for what I was trying to say) and the grammar was exceptionally poor, and sentences were often repeated or in the wrong order. I could look at it and it seemed to make sense, but like most married men, I had an “editor” who helped me get through it.
It didn’t take long to see that this was a good disciple for me. My abilities at the time to write about the “front lines” too was also diminished. I therefore started to just write about anything….like my life.
So it has been a wild journey to 800 and I have every intention to work toward 8000. I appreciate everyone who reads it, and I love the comments as well, even though some are in foreign languages requiring me to translate them. But it has been an unbelievable journey filled with many blessings. Thank you for sharing part of it with me.
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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We were just sleeping, I swear……

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It is an interesting night at the Tirman home. Ben is sitting in a chair on the back porch (where he was attempting to interfere with the writing of this blog) ordering his brother around as if he is bigger than him. He does think he is Scotty’s boss, which is funny in itself, but they are as thick as thieves.

Amanda is packing. No, this is not another work trip, but an emergency trip to Arizona to be with her sister. Rhonda has thrown out her back, and with a newborn, a 6 year old, and her husband working out of state, she needed some help. Amanda wanted to go help her too and I was more than happy to oblige. After all, I still am hurting from my sneezing during my sermon on Sunday. Oh the sneeze didn’t hurt, it was my feelings. It was really inappropriate for Amanda not to say “God Bless you,” but to instead get all excited and start screaming, “Just walk toward the light Tom, just walk toward the light.” Most of the congregants (though I have not polled them) want me around. I am sure I am good for something, and sure, even if I cannot think of anything, I know my grandma still loves me….but I digress again.
So in the morning I will be taking Amanda to the airport. She will be gone till Friday night, but probably will not be worried at all until she remembers that the only female supervision we have here will be the cat…..that we can bribe with treats. (All the boys do is sleep….we are innocent, in advance, I swear) I do have that whole work-thing to do, and a ton of other stuff that should make damage here minimal. But it will be a boy’s adventure for 4 full days I am sure.
I do have a funeral tomorrow followed by an eye doctor appointment. I have lost my glasses, but since I only need them to see, I have not been too anxious to find them. In all honesty I was worried to tell my wife I lost them. But a new pair is cheaper than a guide dog (plus you do not need to feed glasses) so I should have a new pair soon.
So for now I will just call it a night. I will need to get her to the airport early and it will be a full day. I am thankful however for the opportunity to live it. Each day of my life is such an adventure and though they often seem bizarre, they really do entertain me. Thanks for letting me share this day with you!
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Of siblings and life lessons…….

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Yesterday would have been my sister Sarah’s 45th birthday had she not died in 2004. I think about her and my sister Stephanie (Steph died in 2001) a lot, especially lately as I see Ben, Stephanie (named after my sister….they were great buddies) and Scott (who we sometimes call Sarah just to make him mad) together. Of course Stephanie is now at college, so she mostly interacts with Ben just on Skype, but Scotty and Ben hang all the time.

My sisters and I had more of an adversary relationship. They were close and I was really more of an outsider than anything. (Black sheep of the family, really, although my hair at that time was all blond I swear). Our relationship seemed to exist to aggravate each other, which I pretty much made my full time job. My younger siblings, Mike and Anna, are both at Butler now (where I went in the 1930’s) but we never grew up together. We are close, but we are also now all adults.
I guess what I am expressing is a bit of regret and perhaps even envy of my kids. My sisters and I talked about this a bit before they died, particularly my sister Stephanie and I. And though we all could pull each other’s strings, perhaps as well as even a spouse, what we all regretted was not recognizing that sooner. We wasted a lot of good time for important things as kids, and now time has been taken away. I would suppose both of them would tell me (after expressing what an idiot I was) that they were proud of me for at least fostering those things in their niece and nephews….and that I have.
Tonight Scott and Ben read some stories together, watched some TV, and now Ben is travelling around the house spouting off some ridiculous lines that his brother taught him, with Scott following him around laughing as he says them. One of them is always grabbing a foam sword and shouting something about “mateys” and “treasure,” leading to a brother’s sword fight in the living room.
Oh they do fight, not with the skill of their old man, but with the love of siblings. I know they will get to where I am with little regret, and for that I am truly thankful.
I suppose who we are develops a lot from the collective experience of our lives. My life has been quite “colorful” as they say, but despite living through the school of hard knocks, there is very little I would change. But I confess, I would change that relationship with my sisters. They were both pretty awesome people, and I missed out on a lot. That is my cross to bear, and though I cannot change it, I can and am dealing with the present and future. And one day (hopefully many years from now) when I am with them again I can apologize to them once more.
They were both pretty amazing sisters and I miss them……they taught me a lot, and I am thankful for the blessings they were (most of the time) in my life!
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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A day of many blessings……..

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Today I am posting early, not because I am trying to get things done sooner, but because of the day.

This morning I officiated at a wedding that was more public than any I have ever done. Carie Parrino and Neill Waters (now Mr. and Mrs. Neill Waters!) were married this morning on the steps of the monument right in the dead center of Indianapolis. It was a wonderful wedding and a perfect day. People were all around what we call “the circle” which is the road surrounding the monument and it put a smile on every face. It was an amazing blessing to be there.
There were also a lot of soldiers in fatigues downtown today, and it was through a few of them that I got one of the most amazing blessings of my life. After the wedding, with the bride and groom already gone, and with me still in my vestments putting things away, three of these soldiers came over to talk with me…..and they asked me if they could each take their picture with me. It was one of the biggest honors of my life.
No, it had nothing to do with me…….but for me, it had everything to do with them. These brave men and women of our Armed Forces mean a lot to me. The represent much more to me than I could ever express and I am more appreciative of what they do for us, for freedom, and for our great country than any words I could ever write could describe.
These soldiers were not from Indiana, but they put their lives in harm’s way for the people here, reflecting great character and commitment that I have always admired. It was a great blessing to be seen with them, and to have the opportunity to shake their hands and thank them for their service. They are truly my heroes.
So today as I think about how I was blessed today let me close with this. My friends if you are serving in the Armed Forces, or if you have, thank you for your service. I mean that with all my heart. And thanks also to your families for the sacrifices they have made to allow you to serve.
I often hear people ignorantly spout off some silly divisive rhetoric about some wild things they believe in saying, “and that’s what America is all about.” They couldn’t be more wrong.
The brave men and women of our Armed Forces represent the best of what our country stands for. I am thankful for them and I pray for them each and every day! You should too…….and make sure to thank them all for their service!
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Thank God for Superman……..

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Today apparently will never end. I have been to both Nashville (Indiana) and Bloomington today, which was a successful trip. We found a facility in which to house our campus ministry for IU students and will also launch a mission church in the same location. (St. George the Dragonslayer). We almost didn’t get to see it though. It was just on the outskirts of all the police cars and fire trucks. Some construction workers cut a gas main and you could hear and smell it everywhere. I asked one of the guys on that crew about it and he said that when it was cut he never ran so fast in his life. Of that, I am sure….who wouldn’t?

But I needed to come all the way back up to Noblesville to pick up Ben from daycare and take him to our house where I was meeting yet another sitter who would be watching him while I headed back to Monument Circle in Indianapolis (which I had already passed twice today) for a wedding rehearsal for a wedding I am doing tomorrow morning.
Of course we were hoping that Amanda would be home from Canada while I was at the rehearsal dinner, so at least the sitter could go home……but that was clearly too much to ask of Air Canada. By the time I had finished the rehearsal, stopped by the dinner to pick up the license and apologize for needing to get home and relieve the sitter, Amanda had called and said her flight had been delayed AGAIN. She was mad, but not nearly as mad as she was when I was nearly home to tell me that it had now been CANCELLED.
So the last I heard from her she was getting on a plane for Chicago, and hopefully Lilly will have a plan arranged for the remainder of the trip when she lands there. I hope to heck they do too. I would hate to get her any more upset!
But as for me, I came home, paid the sitter, started dinner and went to get Ben in his pajamas. I just pulled them out of the drawer……Superman pajamas with the tags still on. I hope I haven’t ruined a Christmas gift, but sometimes you just need a hero. This day may be never-ending, but I ate dinner with Superman and I am now watching Sprout with him too.
It’s a great blessing to me. I only hope he doesn’t need to fly up to Chicago to pick up his mom.
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Amanda in Canada…..maybe……

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Amanda travels a lot for work, and tonight she is to be in Toronto for a meeting tomorrow. The last I heard however, she was still in Indiana sitting at the airport. She will return tomorrow night, not just because her meeting will be over, but because she does not trust us boys at the house all alone.

I really wish I could go along though. My grandmother was Canadian and that part of my family comes out of Ontario. I always wanted to learn more about Canada too, not just because we are of Canadian heritage, but also because it is so close.
At one point in my ministry I actually lived just about 5o miles from the Canadian border. It surprised me that I didn’t go and visit more often, but I wasn’t that strong enough of a swimmer to get across the lake. Perhaps I will get a chance to drive or fly again soon.
But I want to because it is important. The Canada of my youth was taught to me by television, and I watched a lot of Second City too. It was rugged, snowy, and full of moose….many more than people. And the people there talked funny and drank a lot, which could certainly explain most of my family, but the accent was different since most of my family is from Brooklyn.
But hopefully one day I will get the opportunity. I do love my family, and I do love our heritage, but the Canadian parts I could learn some more of. Perhaps the next trip.
Of course it is now 8:20 and Amanda’s 7:55 flight has been delayed yet another time, now till 9:50. I know what’s probably happening too. There are probably a group of moose (not the American kind spelled “Moose”) out drinking and playing hockey on the frozen lake the plane is to land on. I know for a fact it happens all the time……after all I am 25% Canadian…..
Goodnight and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Da Anniversary…….

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Yep, Amanda and I (and Ben) went out for dinner tonight to celebrate our anniversary. Ben has always gone with us, and he got ice cream tonight for being exemplary in the restaurant. He was not going this year, but since he has been sick, we thought it best to not have a sitter. He was himself all day long and should be back at the babysitter tomorrow. (Scotty already had plans)

Last year we went to “Build-a-Bear” after dinner where Ben and Amanda picked out an anniversary bear. It was already after 8 when they reminded me, but fortunately for me the ice cream was an easy distraction. We will get this year’s anniversary bear a few days late, as Amanda travels to Canada tomorrow for a few days.
But for now it is another one in the books. We are all exhausted and will now head to bed. Ben’s flu, and the past few days have been hard on us all. The greatest gift tonight will be the sleep I get……and I hope to be out before 9:15 pm!
Happy Anniversary Amanda…….you are one lucky woman! hahahahahaha
Goodnight my friends and God Bless from delusionville!
Tommy+
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The Storm before the Calm….aka. Da Flu

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Yep, wouldn’t you know it? Ben was, and is sick. He threw up all over our bed last night, has a fever, and even made a trip to the doctor today. He moans and whines, and he does not want to eat. The poor little guy is having a hard time.

And of course it is harder on Amanda more than anyone. She cannot stand to see him suffer one iota, and because of that she gets way too involved. You would think a microbiologist would have a better handle on things like contagious germs, but love causes us to lose our perspective sometimes. I am trained to be careful and always am. It’s not that I do not get sick, because I do. It’s just that part of my job is to not pass anything on. So I imagine I will be okay, and for our anniversary tomorrow I may be taking care of TWO sick patients. We will see.
But the good news is that Father Dan and Merry Ann went out for their anniversary today and neither one is sick! They love seafood and ate wonderful anniversary lunch (at least it was for them…it was probably bad day however for the fish and shrimp). And I have given up asking them how long they have been married too. Dan’s number is always much lower than Merry Ann’s by at least 25 years and she always prefaces it with “It seems like.” I would have confessed this a lot sooner too, but I wanted to make sure Danny was ordained a priest prior to the higher ups finding out he is wearing out his wife. Pray for her….she’s a saint!
Anyway, Amanda is working and I need to get back to caring for the boy. There is no need to worry either……..I AM A DOCTOR (albeit the wrong kind) and I have watched a lot of “Scrubs” on the TV. He’s in great hands!
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Hopefully not heading down a bad road…..

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Well this post will be short. We went out to look at buildings tonight on the west side of Indianapolis to move Holy Spirit into, but our attention kept being pulled back to Ben, who was certainly not feeling well. He still played and gave us his usual commentary from the back seat, but seemed to be crashing and in need of going home and heading to bed.

So bed it is for us all. Please keep him in your prayers and hopefully the little guy can make a quick recovery.
Goodnight my friends and God Bless.
Tommy+