All posts by Fr Tom Tirman

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Tails (yes it is spelled wrong) from the dog house…..

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Ben wanted to “save big money at Menard’s” tonight, and so Amanda and her mom reluctantly took him along on their shopping trip. (Amanda was the reluctant one, his grandma would take him anywhere) But since Scotty was at work, and while I was alone, I thought I would earn some “brownie points” (which I do not know why they are so important to earn, especially since I was kicked out of the Boy Scouts before even making “tenderfoot”) by cleaning the kitchen while everyone was gone.

But shortly after I got the dishwasher running I remembered that my mother-in-law wanted to buy another Roma tomato, which I thought was something they might forget, so I called them. And sadly I discovered that my night was going to be a rough one.
If you have been a husband and a father for any length of time you will know that when your child, and it doesn’t matter which child, is causing problems for your spouse it will be YOU who will be in trouble. Sadly the misbehaving is ALWAYS blamed on genetics and the misbehaving parts of your children will always be attributed to YOUR DNA and not your spouse’s. And if I thought there was a chance to argue that point I just might, but who would be dumb enough to argue with a scientist.
So when I called out of courtesy to talk about produce it was clear that it was my DNA that was wailing in the closed confines of the car at whatever location they were. And my wife, who is generally very pleasant (always when sleeping and most of the time while awake) was quite curt to me on the phone. But in all honesty, it was probably her fault. I am sure he probably just saw some $250 Transformer at the Wal-Mart and she selfishly probably bought all of us food instead. She can be like that, an unreasonable tyrant at times I swear.
So the dog house will house more than the dog this evening. And actually, if the truth be known, the dog hardly sleeps in it at all (he is a 1st class show dog with good DNA). But when tomorrow comes Ben will be all full of hugs and kisses and his crimes will be forgotten. But I will just stay here in the dog house waiting for him to return.
I really tire of all the travel, and to be honest, it’s not so bad when you get used to it.
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+
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A boring boring post…..

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Well it is 10 o’clock and Ben is in MY bed with his mom, Scott and the dog are in the basement playing music, my mother-in-law is in her room getting ready for bed, and the cat would have abandoned me too if it were not for the cat treats I keep in my office. (I particularly like them because I cannot find them in my calorie book, so I figure they do not count for me.)

But in truth, it has been a long day. Today we attended the funeral of the father of our Board President, Sarah Crowmer. Her father Milton had fought Alzheimer’s for over 10 years. Her mom died 5 years ago, and it was hard to see her so broken up. She is like a sister to me, and she is Ben’s Godmother. I just ask your prayers for her and her family. She is a pretty good egg, and like I said like a sister to me…….a much older sister. (see, we are like siblings)
So tomorrow morning I am scheduled in Nashville, and I am looking forward to it. I was originally scheduled in Kokomo, but I am going up there for a particular event this time, so we postponed it a week. I love being able to see all the people in all our missions. It is one of the blessings of my position.
But for now it is just the cat and I eating these treats. I am making sure she eats all the seafood ones since I am allergic, and it appears to be about as wild as I will get to be tonight. Oh if only reality TV would do a show on us!
Of course it would have to be done filming pretty early……..we are obviously not a very exciting group of guys.
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Moving down in the polls……

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I love my kids, but when there is a grandma around I do not get as much time. As an example, I was following Ben to get this picture, but he really just wants to hang with Nanny. And even at dinner, though I was gone the last couple of days, he protested sitting by me, choosing (but not getting) instead his Nanny and Mommy.

But thus is the life of a dad. At one point in your life, your wife, who is then your girlfriend, hangs on your every word…..but suddenly a few years later, no one really listens at all, and your rank goes from number one to somewhere in the teens, even behind the dog and the cat. As an example, I am here in my office typing this while everyone else is downstairs……even “man’s best friend,” that traitor the dog. He has probably had 10 biscuits today and all of them from me. Does he remember? Nope, not even him.
But I am not bitter nor even surprised. It is the life I expected. Being a dad is a great honor and privilege and even though there is occasional “rank loss,” if you are faithful and steady sooner or later things come back around. After all, Amanda throws like a girl and in a few years he will tire of that. And sometime tomorrow that traitor is going to want to go for a walk, or better yet need another biscuit. The cat just uses me like all cats use everyone. (Cats are always 1-10 in their own book), so I will not worry. And sooner or later I will be the grandpa and everyone will love me again.
Because as I said, I am not bitter, but I will remember. I won’t be giving them a thing, but I intend to spoil the daylights out of my grand kids!
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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O Peoria, who’d-a-thought……..

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Well, it finally happened. I finally was part of a service more mind-blowing than my previous record, which was in 1987.

Tonight, in St. Andrew’s Anglican Church in Peoria, we ordained Greg Lynn to the Diaconate. And what made this mind-blowing was that my boss, an Anglican Mission Bishop, had invited the Diocesan Bishop of Quincy to come and take part. St. Andrew’s is in the Diocese of Quincy, and it was a delight to be a part of two bishops sending forth a young man into the ordained ministry. BUT the Bishop of Quincy is the Abbot of a monastery not far from there and he brought some of the brothers and TWO other bishops. That’s right, four bishops, which if you were playing chess would be a complete set, and something I had never seen or been a part of.
Now of course everyone commented about how special it was that Greg had four bishops there, not once considering that perhaps he needed them. But rather than digress into a discussion of Greg’s needs, let me say that it was just an amazing time, and I was not just blessed by it, we ALL were. And Greg is now ordained and is heading toward launching a church that the people of Peoria will be blessed by too. He is a quality guy with a great wife and kids. It has been a wonderful evening, so it is off to bed so I can get up and drive home tomorrow.
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Coincidence….I swear!

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(YES, this is an old picture)

It is all a coincidence I swear. I will be leaving for Peoria, Illinois tomorrow morning, and it just happens to be the same day that my Mother-in-Law is coming for a 11 day visit. It seems that a lot of people are questioning my integrity on this one, but I in fact am leaving for work.

I am a priest, and no where near being a Bishop (nor would I want to be) but it was the bishop who scheduled the ordination I am heading to tomorrow. And sure, I know he and I are friends, and I know that some may say, “I bet he paid Doc to schedule then,” but nope…it was all his idea. If the truth be known, I will be happy to attend the ordination, but would have been happy to see my Mother-in-Law too.
Yes, I am one of those guys who gets along with his…….we actually like each other. But really, who wouldn’t want me to marry their daughter? Amanda was a real mess, and is still a work in progress. And I am sure everyone who knows her is thinking, “yeah, thank God for him in her life.” She is one blessed woman. (Yep we will see if she really reads these blogs like she says she does or not, won’t we?)
But I will be home soon enough and get plenty of family time……not with Ben, mind you. Because with his “Nanny” around there is really no use in even trying to get his attention. Nothing is closer than a boy and his grandma!
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Boxing Day, Tirman Style……..

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I am not really all that sure what “Boxing Day” is, but when Ben asked us to be able to take a nap in an old moving box this afternoon, I decided that Boxing Day must have something to do with it. So Ben hauled up the box, his Spiderman pillow, and his Cubs blanket and climbed into the box to take a nap.

It actually reminded me of my cousin Steve, who a few years ago in order to understand homelessness talked about sleeping in a box, I believe in downtown Valparaiso. I am not sure whether he ever did or not, but one thing I can say was that if he did, Ben was much more comfortable. His box was even sprawled upon wall to wall carpeting.
And a good nap it was! He slept about 3 hours and when he awoke, he was very proud of himself. Apparently it is a big accomplishment to sleep in a box for so long, and I really wasn’t aware of that because the only mammal I ever saw do such a thing was the cat, but she can sleep anywhere.
So as they say, everything is clearer in hindsight, and knowing what I learned today I would have forgone the crib and the beds I have bought him and just grabbed a box from somewhere.
Lord knows he likes my bed better than his own anyway….and in truth, I think his cost more.
Oh well, live and learn.
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Oh….I forgot!!!!!

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Wow….what an idiot! I forgot to post the coolest thing that happened last night. I could not take a picture because it was too dark, but it was something that reminded me of why I LOVE living in Indiana.

After dinner at the “Texas Road House” in Anderson, Ben and I left early because there was a policewoman in uniform waiting to be seated for what was probably her lunch. Ben and I went to meet her. He, like all three year olds, is fascinated with the police, and he was more than happy to head her way. Of course when it came down to meeting her, he chickened out and walked right by. However, when I said “I thought you wanted to say hi to her,” he turned right around and told her he was three. And from there you could feel the love.
And suddenly there was another officer who was there to eat with her, and he talked to Ben too. And he was in three year old heaven. But the best was yet to come as we went out toward our car and met the third officer coming in. Ben was VERY excited and said hello. And this officer asked him if he wanted to see his CAR.
Of course Ben said YES. And suddenly there were lights and sirens in the parking lot of the Texas Roadhouse….all courtesy of newly swore in three year old police officer Benjamin Scott Tirman. He couldn’t have been happier.
One of the things that I suddenly realized is a sense of home. There is a real feel about Indiana, and although I had been missing it for many years I felt it then. I grew up in a small town, and was the product of a way of life I often have trouble expressing…..but I saw it and experienced it again last night.
I love it here and I thank God for it. What a blessing and a privilege to see and experience what I did last night!
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Anniversary Entertainment…….

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Today we celebrated the four-year anniversary of our ministry here in central Indiana. There was even a very nice pitch-in following the service there, but one I could not stay for due to a pastoral emergency. But I was told everyone had a marvelous time.

I do have to say that it is quite an accomplishment, and from that one sort of “non-intentional” church plant, many others have sprung. It hardly seems possible that it was four years ago, but then again lots of things hardly seem possible these days, particularly things like I will turn 50 this year.
But after I finished my day, Amanda, Ben, and I were able to join Fr. PT and his wife Jewel for dinner to celebrate. Ben put on my glasses in an attempt to entertain us all, and that’s where the picture comes from. He was very entertaining, far more entertaining than either PT or I, and he was relatively cheap too, in that kid’s meals are next to nothing. That’s how Scotty lost his job as our family dinner entertainer….he switched from the kids mean to the filet.
But the anniversary is finished and we are home and I am looking forward to going to bed. I am beat. From my office however I hear the voice of that “baby turtle” coming from my room.
He’s still funny, but I think his kid’s meal is feeling more like the filet tonight to me…….
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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Let em eat cake…..oh wait, they are done…..

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Yep, a cake party, and I wasn’t invited. Of course the two of them (Amanda and Ben) are most often in their own little world.

An example of this was when I came back upstairs this morning to Ben hiding under the covers if my bed. He was being the “baby turtle” and his mom was the “mommy turtle,” and apparently I was not just “in the water” but from the way he yelled and hid I was apparently some sort of “predator.” And quite honestly I would have sent him to his room if Greenpeace weren’t such a militant group. I am a pastor after all, and I do not need the bad press.
But the two of them enjoy their playtime, especially when Scotty is not around to be Ben’s Assistant. Had Scott been there this morning he would have clearly been the “brother turtle,” which could be taken to mean either “sibling turtle” or “religious turtle,” because I suppose he qualifies as either.
But the fact remains that I am excluded from all the cake and turtle games. No worries though…..because I am really trying to lose the weight, and of course they do not make a shell in my size.
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!
Tommy+
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If you please……

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I am pleased to report that over the last few days I posted my 900th blog. It may have been yesterday, or the day before, but the big news is that I got at least that far. And although at times writing is very challenging for me, the discipline has been a big part of my recovery. If you talked with me in person you would have no idea I have had a stroke. You would instead see me as a typical confused 49 year old married guy…..we are all forgetful, but what about I cannot remember.

But not all of this blog will be pleasing, for this afternoon we got some snow, and it seemed to catch the plows off guard. It was VERY slick, so since I was out at St. Patrick’s today, I decided to head home at about 1:30 and pick up Ben from the sitters on the way. I figured it would be more responsible to get him a few hours early rather than later to avoid the possibility of the roads being worse.
So I picked up Ben…..PRE-nap……and although he was awake, he was not pleased. I tricked him into looking at the camera, but he didn’t speak to me much of the way home. When we arrived, he was then suddenly NOT tired, and still not pleased…this time because he didn’t want or need a nap.
So we watched a few episodes of Transformers (pre-Megan Fox and Even Steven) and then I scratched his back trying to get him to go out. And although I do consider myself a professional parent, all of this (meaning EVERYTHING I tried) did nothing but make ME tired. Now I was not pleased.
How he does what he does I will never know. He fell asleep in my bed with me scratching his back approximately 15 minutes before his mom arrived home, and then they both napped two hours in each others’ arms. Let’s not think he is innocent, because he clearly knows what he is doing. He may have been asleep, but his face had that “who’s the pro now?” look. I am living with a genius I swear.
But the good news is that it is still snowing and we are all safe. I wanted to drive up and visit my grandma tomorrow and see my mom….both for Christmas. Since I have been “not well” these past few weeks I didn’t want to take the chance of exposing them to anything. But I am now fine (the walking has helped clear my lungs) and I was looking forward to it….the snow and ice however will most likely delay those plans for a few days….as it did Viper and I walking today.
So no walk today (Viper is not pleased), and no pleasing anyone else either. But I am not worried. I have progressed a great deal and if I were not so tired I would toast myself for hitting 900. And for that, at least I am pleased.
Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+