All posts by Fr Tom Tirman

Getting my truck back and other things that I am not too thrilled about….

Yes, tonight “technically” I got my truck back.  Scotty is back in California for 36 days for combat training before heading to North Carolina for school.  It has been a great visit with him, and yes, although I have owned my truck for the entire time he has been here he has been the one driving it.  I have only driven it a few times total, since we got it the day before we flew to California to pick Scotty up.  In all honesty, I really would feel better about just getting to complain that I cannot drive it myself if that meant he stayed.  But it is what it is…..Scotty is a Marine and he goes where he is told.  My truck, on the other hand, lives here.

But tonight I post TWO pictures.  The first is Christmas morning here at home, a picture I have been saving.  And the second is tonight in the USO office in Indianapolis of the boys together.

Just as the last month has, today has gone by too quickly.  Scott was on leave for only 10 days but was assigned to the local recruiting office for the last three weeks.  But today, on our last day together, Ben picked our last lunch and we all went to their favorite buffet.  Steph called him from school.  We then got Scotty a haircut and headed to the airport where incidentally, Marines are quite popular.  The military is a family like no other.

But later than you would want to know we heard from Scott.  He called from Phoenix and then he texted from San Diego.  He ended up not sleeping in the USO office but hitched a ride to a hotel with some other Marines he graduated with from NY and will rest up before reporting to Camp Pendleton tomorrow.

So my truck is clean, and it is ready for me, for Ben, and for Viper.  Yes, I have missed her……yet somehow in my heart I know that driving her will just not be as satisfying.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Forced into service(s)…….

Like his brother and sister before him, Ben has been called into ever wonderful world of the acolyte.  No, he will not just be any acolyte either, as Steph and Scott can share, they were my own personal acolyte for years…..something they all love at the start, but learn to tolerate down the line.

And today was Ben’s first big day in a robe.  He stood next to me and got corrected ONLY about 10,000 times, which was pretty good considering what I was expecting.  Both the boys are easily distracted, but Ben often can make Scotty look like the King of Focus.  So it was fun today, but it was also an adventure!!

And I wish that Steph could have been there because every time Ben got any kind of “advice” from me, I could see Scotty in the back row of the church laughing and smiling.  He remembers how it was, as Steph would too, and I know it was a real treat for him to see his little brother go through it too.  I should probably post pictures of all of them in that setting just to even the score.

But now Ben is well on his way.  And he loved it too.  We were very proud of him.  MY only real concern is that he said when he was in the car on the way there that he wanted to be the “Anglican priest.”  He had never even worn a robe, yet he wanted my job from the start.  Too funny, but too typical for a Tirman kid.

And as for my job, he can have it…………because what I really want to do is direct.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

And he had choices too……..

Yes, you can tell we are out as a family, because given the choices of children as to who to sit with, they will ALWAYS sit by grandparents.  And although that may have hurt my wife’s feelings it was fine with me…..they said he had cookies and other sugary things before we all met back up.  They could have kept him longer had they wanted to.

But that is always their strategy, and they learn from the masters……our grandparents.  And quite honestly, I too will be ready for some good old “payback,” I am sorry I mean quality time with our children’s children whenever our kids are brave enough to provide them.  Clearly being a grandparent is “the thing” to be, and it will be a blast when it comes.  I even said to my dad today, “Who are you and what have you done to my father??”  And he just laughed….that dang impostor!!

But all is now well and we are home….ALL of us (but Steph who has this “school thing” going on).  Scotty will play at St. Patrick’s in the morning and I will celebrate there and assist at St. Anne’s.  It should be a great day.

So for now I will call it a day and hit the hay as they say, although I am never to sure who it is I am talking about…..but who cares?  I am going to bed!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Relationship counseling……..

Just about every night, right before bed, Ben and his cat (Puddy) get up in the chairs across from my desk and discuss their “problems” with me.  It turns out that there is never really an issue between Ben and his cat, as much as it is a STALLING for in inevitable bedtime.  It is however, entertaining.

What is hilarious however about the whole thing is that this cat is friendly to only a handful of people, but Ben is one of her favorites.  Our vet considers her one of the meanest cats in her practice, and before we stopped taking her in, she would howl and hiss and they would wear what looked like welding gloves to take her out of her carrier.  And she is just about 9 pounds!

Even the dog is afraid of her.  And when we travel Father PT often comes over to feed her and says she  hisses and is pretty mean.  Not a bad way to treat someone who feeds you!!  And if she ever dies, I think our insurance might go up, as she is far more effective than our alarm.

But despite all that, she and Ben have problems, and those problems often need to be discussed.  Amanda and I are just glad they are dealing with it.

After all, who wants something with that kind of personality and temper walking around without therapy??

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Moron Central………

WHAT A MORON!!!  You would think with how long he has been denied a ride in a vehicle, that the very day I SNEAK him into one (my wife’s car – “Marine Mom One”) he would sit like more of a gentleman…..but NO……he sat like a total moron, and thus I had to post his shameful, shameful picture.

Sure, he was enjoying the ride, but in all honesty even I was embarrassed for him.  He is a SHOW DOG for God’s Sake, and he sat there panting, and undignified, just enjoying the heck out of being able to be in a car.  It was quite a sight.

But in all honesty, I was happy for him.  Scotty heads back Monday and I will reclaim my truck and Viper will reclaim his seat.  He will no longer sit as if he needs medication, and I will no longer look at him wondering how such an expensive show dog with such good lines could have so much wrong with him.  It will be a victory for us all!

But for now I just want to go to bed and forget this picture.  Times are changing and in another week this will be a distant memory…..at least I hope it will.  I am just glad this picture is not Amanda, Ben, Steph or Scott…..because at least I continue to hold out some hope for them!!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

I love you THIS MUCH DAD (for a cookie)…….

There are TWO significant points to make about this picture, one Ben is happy at dinner, despite being upset only minutes before, and two, Amanda has been cut out of the picture by request (directive).  But it is a great picture, isn’t it??

It’s hard to believe looking at him that he will probably end up doing hard time, either in prison or in Church….it is all often about the same.  But he is my son, and I will love him regardless!

Now he was mad a me a few minutes earlier for not allowing him to eat a second cookie before having ANY dinner at Wal-mart.  We were there to buy a sweeper for St. Patrick’s whose sweeper entered into the great beyond a few weeks ago.  My sweeper has been making the trip since that time (when I have remembered) and my memory has not been to the standard that it should be in terms of the floors there.  I bought a new sweeper.

The good news is that I not only was able to purchase a new sweeper for St. Patrick’s, but that we also were able to eat before heading home.  No, it was nowhere the evening we had planned, nor was it on our list of possibilities.  But sometimes God surprises you!  And in all honesty, I will take it!

We are home, and we are full.  Ben is now in bed, and the floor at St. Patrick’s still needs sweeping, but at least now there is a sweeper there!!

I would say that life does not get much better than this, but I certainly know it does!  I just thank God for a day that I feel ahead, and hope to make even more progress tomorrow!!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Some observations on my life……

Yes, I discovered midday that I had not posted a blog entry for yesterday.  Normally, that would have thrown me into a tailspin, as I would connect it to some sort of “brain-malfunction” connected to my stroke and would frantically work to do one ASAP.  After all, I write daily as a therapy to recover and keep myself sharp.

But now things are a bit different.  With Scotty home, being down to one car between Amanda and I, Ben in school, and the craziness of our everyday lives, I have come to the conclusion that sometimes I just get behind or even forget.  Sure, I remembered……but I was nowhere near a computer till now.  I suppose I could type something on my cellphone (it is a supposed “smartphone”) but I cannot see that small, plus to be a smartphone and function as such has a lot to do with the operator.  So I have adopted the philosophy that if I just can’t I can’t…..beyond that I will not worry.

I am pretty sure that no one’s life is in danger due to this rare occurrence (or non-occurrence as it were), but I DO APOLOGIZE to the readers, for I do intend and want to post everyday.  I would just encourage you to be thankful that, although I am a doctor, I am not a medical doctor.  After all, the very idea that I could be hovering over someone in surgery and wondering what I was supposed to do or forgetting things could possibly be pretty bad (I really don’t know as I have not studied medicine).

So I will just keep on being me, and doing the best I can.  It is not perfect, nor is it always pretty, but it is me and it is my life.

In just 6 days Scotty will be gone, Steph is already in Missouri, I will have my truck back, and things will be what Amanda and I call “normal.”  But normal (without us all together) is not our preference.  Even that 66.666666% is not it either.  Missing stuff and forgetting things, or being overly busy with all your family is far better than nailing it at less than 100%.  But it is my life, and I will live it the best I can regardless of the circumstances.

So here is my post for today……a rambling complaint/pseudo-apology guised in the form of a blog-post that is often described as therapy by a guy who is now probably well beyond that…..but who is paying attention to any of it?

My life is what it is, but I’m happy with it.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Some passing thoughts…….

Tonight’s picture is of the chicken section of our local Hobby Lobby and is a tribute to the lovely and talented Stephanie Tirman, who is not just a great daughter, but who is VERY FOND of chickens…..just ask her…..but I digress.

Today however, I was able to do TWO very significant things….  One was to drive MY TRUCK down to St. Matthew’s in Nashville, Indiana where I was the Celebrant today and also delivered the sermon.  And since I have only driven it a couple of times since we got it because Scotty needs it to work, it sort of felt like a “date” with my truck……a date that ended far too soon!  Scotty leaves on the 21st and then we will grow to be tired of each other I am sure.

The second thing was having the opportunity to have a personal conversation with Scotty about many different things.  He was on leave for 10 days after graduation and is now working for the recruiter here locally.  But he is a US Marine, and his time is not his own.  Yes, I do know that I will be able to drive him to the airport and see him then, but other than that, there are NO guarantees.  He and the other Marines are told what and when to do what they do and they just do it.  So obviously any time I get to talk or see him is valuable to me.  I had a short bit of it today too.

But now that the day is done and Ben is in bed, I can get the opportunity to talk to my wife.  We live busy lives and they often are driven by circumstances beyond our control.  Soon enough it will just be the two of us, and it is often like that after Ben goes to sleep.  But the kids are all important to us, and like many before us, we struggle with them leaving the nest.

It too will pass though and in time new chapters of life will be revealed.  And I am looking forward to it too…….especially that long-term relationship I intend to carry on with my truck.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Our night out with the twins……

Yes, tonight we were finally able to go out with both Scotty and Ben together.  We went to the Mexican restaurant in downtown Anderson, which has just recently changed its name.  Our very familiar waiters all looked a lot different now in white shirts and ties, but the food was great, the company was great, and it is ALWAYS great to take an occasional hiatus on the diet…..particularly there.

And Ben and Scott were in rare form.  They are just alike in so many ways and generally harass each other through ANY meal, but always when we are out.  Ben was wearing his glasses, because he is almost blind, but before you believe that remember he is also a pro football player, a scientist, a US Marine, and a variety of superheroes.  Yes, they indeed are just clear glass and when he takes them off, if he remembers, Helen Keller could be his guide.  He is most likely going to win an Oscar someday.  He is constantly in character, although with a plethora of personalities, it is more properly stated that THEY are always in character….meaning Ben.

But together the boys make quite a pair.  Scotty becoming a Marine has done nothing to indicate that perhaps he and Ben are not twins…..and any time together, particularly with an audience, verifies that they indeed are.

For Amanda and I however, it is ALWAYS fun.  We have just 9 more days with Scotty before he leaves, and we will all miss him, especially Ben.  After all, we all know how twins are.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Possibly seeking visitation rights……

Yes, this is a picture (a few weeks old) of my new truck, which as I shared before is old, a 2006.  I got it when we traded in my little itty bitty 2009 Toyota Matrix the day before we left for San Diego to pick up Scotty.  And since Scotty has been home on leave and now working for the recruiter for 10 more days before heading back, I hardly see my truck……and I hardly see Scotty either.

And this is of course not what I envisioned on either count.  When we drove the truck home I just loved the feel.  I hated driving a car and it all just felt so right.  But without a car for Scott (we sold his car when he left for boot camp) he needed to drive something……my truck. I had and have driven it only a few times, and now I am back to driving (for 10 more days)………a CAR.

Now sure, you can say that my wife’s car is more than a car, after all it is an SUV.  BUT, as a gift to her before Christmas, I bought her a license plate for the front that I promptly put on……it says “Marine Mom.”  Yes I may no longer be driving a little itty bitty car, but apparently either I am showing my feminine side or being pretty dang cocky and edgy…..I will go with the latter.

But a few days back I had to “visit” my truck at the recruiting office in Noblesville.  As I pulled up, three Marines (one was Scotty) started to giggle and made sure they mentioned the plate.  Now I am not their boss, but I am an old dog, and with that comes experience.  So I asked them, but only if they would like, to trade vehicles with me so they could visit high schools and such in their Dress Blues in the Marine Mom Express.  It was almost as if I were their Drill Instructor.  Needless to say, I left with my wife’s car and her girly (but ISMC tough) plate.

So I am getting up at 6:00 am tomorrow to see my truck.  Yes, I will do all I can to see her.  I know it is just 10 more days, but I do miss her.   And with any luck, I may get to see my son Scotty as well.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+